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Loneliness

5/23/2012

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The loneliness, the emotional isolation, which comes with widowhood can only be understood by those who have been initiated by death into this solemn sorority.  The physical and emotional isolation is unparalleled – only those who have “been there, done that” can relate to the devastation experienced when the memorial service is over and the crowd has gone.  Suddenly, widows are all alone, or so they feel.

            The soul of a widow cries for life’s rewind button to take her back to her familiar past; however, life has no rewind.  The only selection is play by play of the here and now.  How can a widow cope when she feels totally stripped, totally naked, with no physical partner to help her? Truly, she has become one half of a pair, and she feels half of herself is now missing.  What can she do?  Should she search for new relationships to fill the void; should she withdraw into the solitude of depression; should she try to fill the void with physical things, or should she just deny the pain and live a lie?

            Fortunately, the Christian widow has a unique opportunity to learn of the care and compassion of our Savior as never before.  Jesus understands the feeling of being totally alone, totally forsaken.  On the cross, He cried, “My God, My God why have you forsaken Me?” (Matt. 27:46)  He knew the devastation of being separated from a part of Himself; He understands the widow’s heart more than any other can, and He longs to fill the void.  He is the only solace and healing in this storm of life.  All others are only quick fixes which will fail again to reveal the root issue – a heart in need of healing.

            As widows allow themselves to be drawn into a new intimacy with God, they develop a new life with God filling the part of themselves which has been stripped away.  This new relationship will lead them to declare the words of  Isaiah 54: 4-5:
            ". . . And will not remember the reproach of your widowhood anymore.

            For your Maker is your husband, the Lord of host is His name; And

            your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel; He is called the God of the

            whole earth."

            Life can have fulfillment again as each of us, as widows, find an intimacy with God which can fill the voids and regenerate a meaningful life for us.  Fall into the arms of a Savior who knows your heart and  who wants to heal it.


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            Dr. Melanie Riddle
    Melanie is a retired high school teacher, an ordained minister, and Director of Haven of Hope Ministries.  She is a graduate of Anderson College, Erskine College, Clemson University, and Southern Baptist School for Biblical Studies.   Also, she is the author of  Hope's Gentle Embrace and Whatever Happened to Recess.  She and her two children reside in Belton, South Carolina.


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